Things that are Things

 

I am having a hard time staying focused and finding balance as of late.  There is a lot going on in my life, and much of it has the potential to be very good.  As usual, I can't help but think I don't deserve good things.

This usually leads to some form of self sabotage, a talent that unfortunately comes naturally to me. A slight of hand that is hard even for me to spot before it is too late.

It's not like I don't want to change this part of me, but it has been a very hard pattern to break.  In some ways thoughts and behaviors like this end up acting like a feedback loop for me.  

It is going to take a lot more time and energy to sort these things out, but in the end will be more than worth it!